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So What You Saying?
Okay ladies, it’s time for you to fess up.
Have you broken up with someone and now believe that it was a big mistake? Do you think about him constantly and have reminders of him all around you? Do you compare every man after him to him? Do you feel like you will never love anyone like you did him? Hell, are you STILL on love with him?
If you can answer yes to any of those questions, you may have let the man who you feel is ‘The One” go. Here are some additional clues to tell if you indeed, let “The One” go and can’t get past it.
You have “All I Do Is Think of You” by Troop on constant replay. There is not a day that goes by that you don’t think of him and there are so many constant reminders of him that trigger your mind to go back to him that it almost borders obsession. You believe that the biggest mistake of your life was breaking up with him.
Each time we love, we love a little differently – sometimes very much differently. Many of us are lucky enough to fall in love more than once in our lives, each time bringing slightly different tints of the same feelings.
The thing about love is that it’s more of a drug than anything else. It literally releases the feel-good chemicals in our brains that many synthetic drugs target. You become addicted to it, and like a drug, our best high is always the most memorable. And we’ll always be searching for that very same high – or higher.
Even though you have been in other relationships and been in love, nothing compares to what you felt for “The One”…no matter how hard you tried.
Some people come into our lives and leave a lasting impression. Some lovers influence our lives in ways that can be almost frightening when realized.
If you find yourself performing certain behaviors – whether it’s grooming, style of clothing, organizing things in a certain way, etc. – because you know that this person would have liked it that way, then you should never have let him go.
If you find that you have come to like these same things that same, certain way, then the truth is that you never really let this person go.
When it comes to sex, no one has even close to competing with ‘The One’. When you two made love, you could damn near hear the angels sing. Your sexual compatibility was off the chain and the men who came after him have never been able to satisfy you like him. You have even gone so far as fantasizing about him while having sex with other men.
If you can’t seem to get over the great sex and you feel as if no one will ever compare to him, you may have made a mistake by leaving him.
If you would drop everything if he called you for help, you are very clearly not over him. To be willing to drop everything that you’re doing in order to help him when he really needs it, you still care an incredible amount.
How many people can you say you really care about? Better yet, how many people would you drop everything for – leave the country for, risk losing your job for, risk pissing off your current partner for? Probably not many.
The thought of “The One” brings a smile to your face when you reminisce of the love you shared. You would classify him as your everything and would give anything to get him back. Those smiles may not last for long, as you realize that getting back together is not an option, as he has moved on…without you. Thus, the sadness kicks in. The sadness that leaves you feeling like shit.
The brief moment of happiness you felt when he crosses your mind doesn’t last long and you are reminded of what you lost, or rather, gave away.
Although you hate to admit it and probably won’t say it out loud to your girlfriends, you wish it wasn’t too late for the two of you. I’m sure that when you broke up, you felt like it was the best decision…at the time, but as time has moved on, your heart hasn’t. You would give just about anything to be able to convince him that the two of you belong together but the reality is that he has moved on with his life and so should you.
Although it’s hard to get over the one who got away, you have to be honest with yourself and own the fact that you made a big mistake, learn from it and move on. You can’t stay in this place of limbo and although you have tried to get over him by seeing other men, you have to get him out of your system and go on with your life. Besides, you can’t prepare yourself for the new love of your life, if you can’t get past the old one. Do yourself a favor, let it go and move on.