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Self-care, I never really understood the importance of it until I became a mother because it was at that point that everything that I had went into taking care of my son. As a single mom, the day-to-day care of my son fell on my shoulders and my shoulders alone and while I thanked God for the greatest gift imaginable, over time, I began to resent the fact that I was in this thing called, parenting, alone.
Yes, I had help from my family but I didn’t come from a family where they would be okay with watching my baby so that I could go do something as “extravagant” as going to get a massage. Although, it was never said, things like going out with friends to have drinks and going to get a massage weren’t things that “moms” did in my family. Quiet as it was kept, my family, specifically my mother, subscribed to the theory that once you had kids, you didn’t have a life of your own anymore; after kids, your world revolved around them. It took me many years to realize that I couldn’t live my life worried about what my mother was going to say and think, however, self-care still wasn’t easy an easy thing for me to do.
As a single parent (with no help whatsoever from my son’s father), I yearned to be able to share custody so that I could just have a break. It was me, 24/7 and because of that I started to fall into a bit of a depression. I realized that I wasn’t happy and outside looking in, I was a great mom, who worked full-time and provided for my son, but upon closer look, I was slowly losing myself. One day, I had an epiphany and realized that I wasn’t going to be any good to my son if I didn’t start being good to myself and that’s just what I did.
It’s important to remember that self-care is more than having massages every month or spending the day at the spa. Self-care are the simple things that you do, that you enjoy and that make you happy. Here is a list of some of my favorites: