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Did You Overlook Your Soul Mate Because of FOMO?

Dating & Relationships / Real Talk with Single Mommy... / May 16, 2016

FOMO — a.k.a, Fear Of Missing Out—can keep the best of us from recognizing a good thing when we have it. In today’s world, opportunities are abundant and there’s always a lure of something more.

Let’s face it, we’ve all been at one amazing event and woken up the next day to a plethora of social media postings of a killer event we missed. No matter how great your night was, you can’t help but feel as if you’ve missed out on something big.  That same nagging feeling can creep into our dating and relationships and create havoc – causing us to miss out on something real. If you think FOMO may be blocking you from finding your true love, ask yourself the following;

Am I dating too frequently?

Are you dating back-to-back nights? If so, you may not be giving yourself enough time to let the thoughts and feelings of one date settle in before moving on to the next. Try creating space between dates and events.

Am I comparing one person to another?

Are you on a date with Mr. Big and already thinking about what you could have been doing if you were out with Mr. Bigger? It’s hard to know what Mr. Big has to offer if you’re thinking about someone else the whole time. You may have the perfect situation sitting next to you, but you miss the genuine moment because you thought you should be somewhere else. Don’t put yourself or anyone else in a situation where you are constantly comparing. Everyone loses.

Do you delay saying yes so you can see if something better comes your way?

Do you immediately accept a great date, or do you wait hours or days to accept? You may be unknowingly creating a pattern of waiting for something better. If you feel good about the opportunity, then say yes and make the most of it.  Trust what makes you happy and stop worrying about something that might appear to be more interesting.

Identifying your patterns of FOMO is crucial to getting and finding your true soul-mate. After all, he may be sitting right next to you! Listen to the moments that are yours and stop worrying about the moments that aren’t. After all, your moments are the only ones that truly matter.

Kelly Green lives in Austin, Texas, and is the author of Back in the Game: My Year of Dating Dangerously, a memoir.

Photo credit: Blue Skyz Studios via VisualHunt / CC BY-NC-ND


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Ty Knighten
Ty Knighten knows a thing or two about relationships and dating. A single mom from Calif., Ty decided to turn her experiences in love and relationships into a blog. Written with plenty of sass, her mission is to help women empower themselves to realize love, success and confidence through her articles. She writes about dating and relationships from the perspective of a single mom but adds insights that will help women and men as they maneuver through the confusing world of dating and relationships. You can reach her on Twitter @UHeardMeRight, on Facebook at The Sexy Single Mommy or connect with her on Google+ and Instagram at chocoty.




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24 Comments

on May 16, 2016

Never heard the term FOMO before. Interesting. I had friends who were always looking for better. One lost out on a perfectly great guy because she was a gym nut and went daily and this guy went “only” 3 times a week, never mind that he naturally looked like Stone Cold Steve Austin in his heyday. He fit her ridiculous list in every other way. By the time she realized it, he had found someone else… 2 years of wasting his time while she dawdled was enough 🙂 .

    on May 20, 2016

    WOW!! I bet she is kicking herself. So many times we get in our own way!

on May 16, 2016

This is so true! Living in the moment and taking advantage of opportunities when they are presented will take you farther than waiting for the unknown thinking it’s going to be better.

    on May 20, 2016

    Exactly! Sometimes it takes some of us longer to realize that!

on May 16, 2016

I have never heard of the FOMO term either; but I can see that it is a real issue. We give up that 80 for 20 somewhere else.

on May 17, 2016

Yes indeed! Don’t fear missing anything! What’s for you is just that. Great read, Honey!

on May 17, 2016

I’m a cautious live in the moment type of person. When I met my soul mate I was unsure and I wasn’t looking but I decided to just go with it. I wanted to see where it took me. It has been the ride of my life.

    on May 20, 2016

    That’s good because so many times, we don;t just go with it. We’re too busy worrying about all of the “what if’s.” Maybe I need to take note!

on May 17, 2016

I don’t think I almost missed mine for FOMO but rather more than just plain ol silly. I ended up marrying my best friend from when I was 13 and under my nose all that time at the age of 29 (16 years later)…. best thing that ever happened and so happy that God didn’t let me miss out! lol…but i think some people do miss out because they are to busy worrying about what else is there.

    on May 20, 2016

    Wow!! That’s is really cool. I guess you never know, right?

on May 17, 2016

Yeah!! I’ve never heard of this saying. I just knew when I connected with my husband he was the one. Our souls connected we used to tap on the phone for ours too.

    on May 20, 2016

    That’s awesome! I’ve always heard of that but never knew anyone that “just knew.” That’s what’s up!

on May 17, 2016

I’ve never heard FOMO but I can see how it would happen often. So many times we’re always on the hunt for the next best thing that we forget to enjoy the hear and now.

LiveLifeWell,
Allison

    on May 20, 2016

    I know I have been guilty of that. It’s probably part of the reason that I’m single now. Ha!

on May 17, 2016

I haven’t had this problem lol. Now…lack of dating prospects? Yep. Great post. Enjoyed reading it.

    on May 20, 2016

    I can totally relate to the lack of dating prospects. That’s the tough part

on May 17, 2016

When I was still on the market, I was definitely guilty of comparing dates. I think comparing dates has its pros and cons. These are great tips!

    on May 20, 2016

    Thanks. I believe they have pros and cons, too, but I know I have been guilty of letting a great guy go, thinking that the grass was greener on the elsewhere. Man….

on May 17, 2016

I gave up FOMO for NOMO lol. Dating can be exhausting and I’m at the point where I just can’t be bothered! If it happens, it happens, but I’m not intentionally looking anymore.

    on May 20, 2016

    LOL!!! Yes, the entire dating thing is beyond exhausting. I’m working on a post now that talks about this whole dating mess thing! Stay tuned!

on May 18, 2016

Great tips, and I completely agree with them! I needed this post in my college years, lol! Now a know better, so I do (a little) better.

    on May 20, 2016

    LOL! I guess with age comes wisdom. If we had known all the things we know now in college, we would have been on easy street, right?



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