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Help! I Have Been Dickmatized!

Dating & Relationships / From the Editor / August 20, 2014

Dear Sexy Single Mommy,

Girl, I need your help! I was a silent viewer of your Twitter Chat because I was a little embarrassed about my current situation and it seemed like all of the women had been there but were not currently being dickmatized.  I had not heard the term, “Dickmatized” before but when you posted the definition, I began to realize that I was that chick who had fallen victim to the BEST DICK IN MY LIFE & when I tell you that I have lost my ever-loving my behind it….Giirrrlllll…I AM A MESS!

I met this guy, who for the sake of this letter, I will call, “Long Dick Willy,” about 6 months ago.  We met at a mutual friends BBQ and hit it off right from the jump.  He is tall, 6’7, former football player, light eyes and sexy as a MF!  All the things that I like in a man, as far as physical qualities are concerned.  We exchanged numbers and talked every day for a week.  We went out to dinner and a movie two weeks later and ended up at his place, in his bed, at the end of the date.  It was never my intention to have sex with him so soon but the physical attraction between us is undeniable and when he kissed me, I couldn’t breathe!


That man took me DOWN! When I say that I could feel him all the way in my stomach…I am NOT lying!  I had never been with a man who was that BIG before and when I rode it, it was damn near in my chest!  But it’s not ONLY about the dick…his tongue had me speaking in tongues! I mean, he put a tongue lashing on my so tough, he could have called me “Kizzy” and I would have responded, “Yes, Massa!”  He put it on my so damn good  that I can’t get it off my mind!  Now, I am walking around like a zombie with my head all in the clouds!  I can’t think about anything else but him!  I want it morning, noon and night!

However, there are some things that I found out AFTER he dickmatized me that I wouldn’t ordinarily put up with from a man… he doesn’t work and the “apartment” that we went to the first night was his brother’s.  He actually lives with his mom “until he get’s back on his feet.”   However, NONE of that even matters because I ONLY want to have sex with him.  We see each other about 3-4 times a week for a “fuck session” and that’s it.  We have never been out on a date after the first time, because I want to get straight to it (as I am sure he does, too!) every time I see him.

My friends think that I have lost my mind because I let him take my car while I’m at work a couple of times a week.  He says that he is looking for jobs or has some interviews, but it’s been 4 months and he hasn’t found one yet.  He doesn’t even put gas in the car but when I complain, he starts kissing and touching me and gets me all hot and bothered that I just let it pass.  Once I found a girl’s phone number in my car but when I confronted him about it, I got the same reaction that I do when I complain about the gas and we end up damn near getting it on in the car!

I have been approached by men who have their shit together but I won’t even give them the time of day because I have been dickmatized by Long Dick Willy.  I know that he is no good but I can’t even see beyond the sex.  Please give me some suggestions on what I can do to walk away from this good dick!


Kizzy ~ Slave to the Dick

What The Sexy Single Mommy Would Do?

Kizzy, my dear, you are in one hell of a predicament!  The good thing is that you have taken the first step and acknowledged that you have a problem!  Now, you simply need to WALK AWAY!

Don’t call him and don’t return his calls.  You need to stay as far away from Long Dick Willy as possible because it seems that you two can not occupy the same space without being all over each other.

You have already noted the things that you would not “ordinarily” tolerate in a man, so you ALREADY know that this is not the man for you.  Besides putting in down in the bedroom, what else is he offering you?  Sounds like nothing but wet sheets and a wet ass.

Long Dick Willy, I’m sure knows what effect his dick has on women and he knew he could dickmatize you right from your initial conversation.  Men like this, pry on women like you…the ones that have never had REALLY good dick and don’t know how to act once they get it and who will do anything to continue getting it!

Kizzy, WAKE UP! Find a hobby or something to occupy your mind and your time.  Hang out with your friends more and be open to  talking to some of the men that approach you.  Give a good man a chance!  Remember above all else, that you are worthy of  having a man who adores you and who thinks much more of you than a piece of ass and YOU, my dear Kizzy, have to expect and demand more of men.  Sex should be the icing on the cake…not just the cake!

What Would YOU Do?

Have you ever been Dickmatized?

How did you get out of that situation? Did you lose your mind and all common sense ?

What advice would you give to Kizzy?

the sexy single mommy

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Ty Knighten
Ty Knighten knows a thing or two about relationships and dating. A single mom from Calif., Ty decided to turn her experiences in love and relationships into a blog. Written with plenty of sass, her mission is to help women empower themselves to realize love, success and confidence through her articles. She writes about dating and relationships from the perspective of a single mom but adds insights that will help women and men as they maneuver through the confusing world of dating and relationships. You can reach her on Twitter @UHeardMeRight, on Facebook at The Sexy Single Mommy or connect with her on Google+ and Instagram at chocoty.

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on June 5, 2013

Dickmatized!!! Hahaha I love it.
I’ve been dickmatized before, you know what I did?
But thankfully he was also a good man, and not just a dickmatizer.

If I were in this woman’s shoes I’d have to lay down some laws before letting him lay down the pipe again. She needs to get a hold of herself and think about what she really wants out of a relationship. If she’s only interested in sex, then let him be just a sexual hobby while she finds a real man that will step up and treat her right and be responsible etc. If she’s not comfortable with dating multiple men at once she needs to WOMAN UP and let this dickmatizer know she needs him to be better. If he cant. Adios big willy.

    on June 5, 2013

    LMAO!!Yes, she does need to established what it is she wants. It is very much time to WOMAN UP. I hope she could get her head out of the clouds!!

      on December 30, 2016

      I’m pretty much in the same situation except I use him as my therapist as well. I have a lot of problems and it helps I can talk to him about them. But far as how he treats me I’m not so sure. I do know this we been on and off for about 3 years now and it sucks because all I need is closure to be done with the situation but he refuses to give it to me. I feel so weak

on June 5, 2013

Ladies need to understand as I have said before how guys view them when they have sex too fast. Most men lose value in a woman when she gives it up so easily. Women tend to become more emotionally involved. Please ladies, keep your legs closed until you are at least sure this is someone that you would want to have a relationship with. Think of how much pain and heartache could be avoided if more woman would wait.

on June 5, 2013

I love it. I like Kizzy, was silent during the session last Wednesday. I have been dickmatized once. I woke up and realized that all I wanted from him was his dickmatization! So we had a few more rounds and that was enough. If I could have it again, I definitely would, but only to get dicked down!

Kizzy, you said that you were only doing it for the dick but it seems as though your emotions crept up on you and played a part in the situation. Now, if you don’t secretly want him, you will have to dis-attached your emotions and just walk away! Trust me there is other dicks out there and one that is attached to a man that will love and respect you in return. So, say bye-bye to that good dick!

Remember at the end of the day, you have to do what is best for you! Good luck!

    on June 5, 2013

    Great advice, Jai

on June 5, 2013

Opps, I forgot this part. I would tell Kizzy to leave this guy alone. She lowered her standards and got caught up. Going forward really consider the quality of man that you are having sex with. Do not answer his calls, see him or have anything else to do with him. A clean break is the best way to get “unwhipped”.

    on June 5, 2013

    I totally agree, Shawn. She most def needs a clean break!

on June 5, 2013

You gave “Kizzy” the best advice ever! Kizzy…giiiiirrrrrllllll…RUN as fast as you can!!!!!

on January 10, 2014

I’ve been in the same situation as Jai. I gave it a few more times and ended it. However, some niggas stalk so it’s better to keep the legs closed.

    on January 10, 2014

    Yes, closed legs are much better. Prevents all sorts of drama

on January 10, 2014

She needs to break that soul tie. I agree with the gentleman that commented earlier, Shawn. We as women need to keep our virtue and legs closed until that special man gives us his last name!

    on January 10, 2014

    I recently heard about “Soul Ties.” It may be a something I need to write about

      on January 10, 2014

      I briefly talk about soul ties in one of my articles!

        on January 11, 2014

        I will have to check it out

on June 17, 2014

I know this is old but this is good, hope kizzy made that clean break it is hard but the only way out

    on June 18, 2014

    Yes, Stacey. I hope she was able to walk away from him

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