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So What You Saying?
What do you really want? That is the question. We all have a desire to meet that special someone. In some of us, that desire is developed over time from childhood, for some a few weeks ago, others the desire comes later in life. To meet that growing basic desire clubs, bars, adventure groups have been created.
Both men and women spend hours getting ready. Trying to put their best foot forward and look beautiful for potential mates.
Some ladies and gentlemen are just there looking to have fun, for the drinks, and to hang with friends. Some are there to meet a mate. Some don’t remember why they are there but they are there (it’s just a habit over years).
The thing that always amazed me was how some ladies will talk about how they are looking for a “REAL MAN”. …Someone who is a PROVIDER with a good job or career. …Someone who wants children and takes care of their family in every way so they can build a life. Someone who is there for them in that moment and listens to them, wipes their tears when they cry, likes the songs that I like…
…then they get to the club and jump the first well-dressed and sometimes not well-dressed bad boy.
Interesting thing is that usually these bad boys are known as BAD BOYS because that is exactly what they are. They are BAD for a relationship because they are BOYS at play with the hearts they come in contact with. But still the ladies ignore the very guys they say they want and jump the BAD BOY. Ladies if one guy is always dancing with 2 or more girls at the same time for more that two songs. That’s not the right guy for you. ..Unless you are into that threesome girl on girl on guy action.
They fall for them and many leave with them. Many regret it!!… in the morning, a week later, or 9 months later. Some find the right guy but he is not BAD enough for them. Or maybe a bit too boring because he is all tongue tied or enamored with your beauty and doesn’t know what to say.
It all boils down to this…
WHY? Think about it.
Either Mister Sexy Bad has never encountered another woman and spent a halfway decent amount of money on her, or had a kid with a woman in the (N) amount of years he has been at the club every week or month since his 20’s. Or he is a BOSS!! Yes!!!… a BOSS!!!… one of the rich 10 percent that doesn’t have to work on whichever day or night you meet them on. One whose work is so good his employees never call him outside of work for help or with a status report on a problem at all hours of any-given night. (Which usually kills relationships and marriages.)
In California more specific Los Angeles or Oakland or any other party place fat chance!!… But chances are good that they have at-least two kids that they are not supporting because it takes lots of money over 18 years to support only ONE kid. Chances are if he does have that much cheddar it is because it came out of necessity (he needed it for another family or to get women drinks at the club and a hotel, motel, holiday inn!… because he can’t take you to his house cause it’s either a one room shack or his wife and kid(s) are sleeping there right now).
Now the guy you passed up at the bar. You know… the GOOD one. The one that wasn’t BAD enough. The one that was not as well dresses and without that aura of confidence built-up from years of playing women and getting out of commitment and maybe a lawsuit or two here and there.
The one that has been working since high school and sure may have been in a few unsuccessful relationships… However, still way less unsuccessful relationships than the BAD BOY. The GOOD one that goes into a relationship for QUALITY NOT QUANTITY.
The Good one… The one that actually takes care of his business and most of his commitments as well as his own child or children; no matter how much it takes away from a luxurious life at the club. …The guy without the $300 plus on in clothing, accessories, freshly relaxed or styled hair.
…The guy that is getting tired of being who he is. The GOOD GUY… The guy that provides for his own family before himself… The guy who WANTS to be the RIGHT Guy for the right woman (the woman who never shows, or shows and then leave with a jerk)…
The Good Guy… The REAL MAN!!…
The one that got away… To quote Taylor Swift.
The Good Guy and right woman both got away from each-other. Life put on hold another day, month, year, decade… Not smart in a city where people get shot everyday.
The Good Guy either goes home with a woman who is totally wrong for him again and starts a doomed relationship, or maybe she’s the right one? Or maybe he just goes home and never sees you again. Calling an old flame or that couple of go to girls for a quickie, or takes that ever popular cold shower, or learns or re-learns to use that favorite hand.
Whatever the case, The Good Guy is usually on the losing end of the stick, even though he is obviously the best choice. Women need to stop overlooking The Good Guy because he is not only the better man but…THE REAL MAN!!
Photo Credit: musedmagonline.com, blacklikemoi.com,