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Online Dating Talk With Paula, Part 2: The Body Of A Profile

Dating & Relationships / April 24, 2014

Last time, Online Dating with Paula, Part 1, we talked about our online dating expectations and how they aren’t met on our terms, sometimes.  But, wait, there’s more!  To slough off the impression that after your initial profile is completed, you’re all done or that, even, your initial profile is the best profile it can be, today we’re going to discuss things to consider when creating and editing your online dating profile.

Just to be on the up and up, it’s okay to give that profile a 2nd, 3rd, even 4th edit or polish.  Online profiles on a dating site are the new first impression.  Even though I’m all about vibes while in the same vicinity as someone, before your physical energies get to tango, you will read each other’s online profile.

Online Dating Talk With Paula, Part 2: The Body Of A Profile

You will determine in less than 5 minutes if you want to reply to this man’s message or “poke” him back. The first sentence or two you read, you’ll hold in high regard. I mean, you don’t have a lot to go off of: pics, grammar (or lack thereof), his favorite hobby, how old he is, to name a few.  You’re judge-y during those first 5 minutes. Anything he says in his profile will be held against him.

Although men are less critical (in general) about these things, you can reason that he’s taking even less time to read your profile and still using your words as some semblance of measurement of your intrigue/coolness/sluttiness/intelligence/etc.  Use this equation for creating a profile that might interest someone you want to talk to: 3 things about you he will both want to know & that you think are cool + a sentence or two about what you’re looking for + one of your long-term goals.  Mamas, you might make one of your 3 things that you have an awesome kid(s).

Putting what you’re looking for won’t stop men who don’t fit the bill from messaging you (think about it: males approaching women, on or offline, face risk, regardless. Why not message a woman whose type isn’t you if you could sway or charm her out of her preferences? Risk. Regardless.), but there will be some who do, that will hit you up.  By adding the long-term goal you’re adding to your substantial appeal. You have other things going on than looking for love, like, or whichever in-between, right?

About pictures: be sure to include a few pics of your face and, at least, one of your figure. Men are visual creatures. Whatever your figure is, there are men who love yo’ body, lady. Plus, the confidence that’ll be surmised by you showing your figure is attractive.  P.s. nudes don’t exude that same ‘confidence’ message. In fact, they exude the opposite.  P.s.s. Make sure your face is in your body pic. Men on online dating sites are suspicious as hell about what they think are chopped and screwed profile pics.

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Paula Montgomery
Paula Montgomery is the head blogger/creator of Deserve More, the lifestyle musings of a 20-something old head, mama, veteran online dater, and writer.

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