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10 Things We Wish Men Knew About Sex

Dating & Relationships / Sex / February 21, 2014

Sex isn’t all that complicated. It’s a biological urge, something we should all know how to do just by instinct, but any woman who has been with a man fumbling around to unhook her bra and appear so suave at the same time also knows perfectly well that it isn’t.

It seems a lifetime of porn and bad advice from older brothers has rendered men incapable of knowing what we like sexually. We ladies aren’t doing ourselves any favors by being afraid to speak up. Over on Alternet, they have a list of “5 Surprising Things About Sex Women Might Be Scared to Tell Men,” such as endurance is overrated (Yes! Yes! Yes!) and “we actually know what will get us to orgasm.” Indeed.

sex feet

So, for you poor guys who are still in the dark, I have asked around and compiled a list of the 10 things we wish you guys knew about sex (and about us). Here they are:

  1. Boobs = attached: Yes, they’re pretty and cool, but much like your testicles, they ARE attached. There is no reason to push and pull and twist to prove anything.
  2. Use your tongue: When you have your head in our nether regions, forget everything you learned in porn. Sticking your face in and shaking like a wet dog is not hot. Repeat: NOT HOT.
  3. Foreplay: Everything you have heard about women needing more than five seconds before you take the plunge? Is TRUE. Dude, our engines need revving. We don’t enjoy the gas being hit too quickly. Remember this, please, for the love of god.
  4. Stop asking us: There are few things more annoying than being in the throes of passion and having some overeager partner who keeps asking, “Are you gonna come?” Dude, it’s great that you care about our pleasure, but we’ll let you know. But you just lost a minute to your overeager questioning. Any more and we will have to cancel it altogether.
  5. Lube it, love it: It doesn’t mean you failed, but if you want to play around, use some lube to get things started. No, many women don’t appreciate fingers being pushed into them at a rapid pace (aka “finger banging”), but they may try it with some lube. Without it? Ouch!
  6. You aren’t 15: Honking, motor-boating, and other adolescent boy behavior is simply not hot. Yes, it’s fun to laugh during sex, but we don’t need to be exposed to you acting a fool. We graduated from high school for a reason.
  7. Cold hands = bad: There is nothing worse than getting all hot and heavy and having your hands be freezing on our skin. Get some blood flowing! Put on circulation gloves! You’ll be rewarded.
  8. Don’t try to impress us: We can tell when you’re trying to be “smooth.” The one-handed bra trick? Doesn’t do it for us. Focus that energy on doing what comes naturally.

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Ty Knighten
Ty Knighten knows a thing or two about relationships and dating. A single mom from Calif., Ty decided to turn her experiences in love and relationships into a blog. Written with plenty of sass, her mission is to help women empower themselves to realize love, success and confidence through her articles. She writes about dating and relationships from the perspective of a single mom but adds insights that will help women and men as they maneuver through the confusing world of dating and relationships. You can reach her on Twitter @UHeardMeRight, on Facebook at The Sexy Single Mommy or connect with her on Google+ and Instagram at chocoty.

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on June 21, 2013

I think it is very telling about our society that “men bring protection or no sex” did not even make the top 10. It seems we are great at focusing on the joys of sex, but rarely do we consider the responsibility of sex.

    on June 21, 2013

    I am SO sure that this list doesn’t encompass EVERYTHING that we wish men knew…

      on June 21, 2013

      Not EVERYTHING, but I would think that just might make the list. I would say that would be a major thing, but maybe not. I have read plenty of stories like these and that usually does not make the list.

on June 21, 2013

lol I love #1 our boobs are attached to us. It is true, some me act like they are there just for their pleasure. When they can feel pain too.

on August 23, 2013

Knowing where the G-point is and what to do with it would probably be helpful. We recently met a couple our age who’d never heard of it. Didn’t have a clue where it is. By couple, I mean a husband and a wife. She had not clue, either.

    on August 27, 2013

    Wow!! That’s a Damn shame!!

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