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So What You Saying?
In my last relationship, I chose to ignore red flags. I turned the other cheek to the warning signs that blared, “He isn’t the one!” and remained committed to the relationship. I could make this work, I thought. So what if he isn’t as affectionate as I’d like. We can work on the lack of sexual chemistry, can’t we? Because he’s a good man, I convinced myself. Blame it on being self-sacrificial, optimistic or an emotional masochist but I really wanted my relationship to work. It didn’t. And with good reason. We are too different. I needed something else that he couldn’t provide. I realized this a week shy of our year anniversary. I stared at my reflection in the bathroom mirror and asked, “Is this the kind of relationship you want forever? Can you be with him forever as he is?” No, I replied. And that was the beginning of the end. We all do this. Women often convince themselves that they can change a man. In relationships, we ignore red flags and obvious dealbreakers. But no more, ladies! I am here to share seven relationship deal breakers women should never ignore.
I learned this the hard way (no pun intended). A lack of sexual chemistry can break a relationship. Even when you find your partner attractive, there can be a lack of sexual connection. Now, don’t dump him after one bad romp. Give it some time but not too much time. With sexual chemistry, you either have it or you don’t. And if you don’t, well, then you’re just friends.
Many women think that a jealous man is cute. I get it. I enjoy it when the man I love pulls me in closer as another dude walks by. But, it’s not cute when he asks who you’re talking to. It is a bad sign when he checks your messages and doesn’t let you do anything without him. That’s not cute jealousy. That’s crazy and dangerous control.
Your man doesn’t have to be BFF’s with your girlfriends. He doesn’t have to spend every day with your family. But he should enjoy their company and vice versa. If everyone you love is giving your man the side eye there may be something you are overlooking. Not everyone can be wrong.
Whitney and Bobby had a song called “We Have Nothing in Common” and their relationship was messy. If you find yourself in the same position your relationship may be in trouble. You have to be able to talk your man about common interests. You should enjoy similar activities. I, for one, love to socialize. I can’t be with a man who always wants to be at home. That was my ex and we are o-v-e-r, over.
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