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The Good Girl vs The Hoodrat

Dating & Relationships / He Said / October 15, 2013

I asked a secretary on my job yesterday what’s something she wanted answers to in regards to men. She told me that guys confuse her. She wanted to know why they say they want a good girl but still deal with hoodrat type women.

Here’s my take:

This issue can easily be compared to the whole “nice guys finish last” complex we have in life. Without going totally that direction let’s talk about how “good girl” is internalized.

When a man hears the term “good girl” I’m inclined to say that he thinks that woman is boring. They hear good girl and they think you’re a prude. They hear good girl and they think your interests aren’t interesting. However much this may be the contrary; that’s the vibe it gives off.

The Good Girl vs The Hoodrat

I have been labeled a nice guy myself by many. I’m not a boisterous dude by any stretch. Some ladies want some rough dude who has to constantly show his assertiveness. I like to say I control shit when it matters. Things only count in the moments they matter. As a guy I had to learn to try and exhibit more of my qualities to women a little faster so they knew I was no push over. They needed to know I was extroverted and that I don’t take no mess. Sometimes being too laid back will land you right in that friend zone.

Hoodrats appeal to many guys because they offer a lot of face value. Educated fellas don’t take hoodrats seriously. Like Eddie Murphy once said, these women just feed your ego. We know most hoodrats to be some of the biggest freaks. Again this may be contrary to how you see yourself. You could very well be a lady in the streets and a freak in the sheets. Men are just more visual. Sometimes a guy doesn’t feel like putting in necessary “work.” These are the types of reasons as to why hoodrats still have relevance in 2013.

The Good Girl vs The Hoodrat

What would I rather?

I’d rather a woman with her shit together and a good head on her shoulders. Maybe being a stone cold freak is tertiary to all of that. What we have to start doing though is start changing the rhetoric. All men want a woman with her business handled. We dig that real heavy. Try to refrain from using the term “good girl.” In all honesty it doesn’t do a damn thing for us.

These are my words and I make no apologies.

Have you dealt with this problem before? Share your story.

 

Photo Credits: nairaland.com


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Damn Pops
Damn Pops is a Brooklyn native and resident. He has aspirations to one day be a marriage counselor and author. He has been "blogging" for 4 years now. You can reach Damn Pops at: Single Black Male Viral Status Twitter: @DamnPops




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4 Comments

on October 15, 2013

I never gave much thought to it before now, but I have to agree that the “good girl” title does have a bland interpretation. I typically think of them as women who lack experience and likely don’t know how to have a good time. I realize that’s an unfair assumption, but the thought still comes to mind. Likewise, when I hear “hoodrat” I’m running for the hills because I have no time for the drama and hoopla that usually comes along with them.

on October 16, 2013

I’m curious. Who comes up with the label of which type a woman is?

    on October 16, 2013

    I would say that it is usually men who label us

on November 10, 2016

I grew up with a very educated mother who was a school teacher and happened to be extremely bousior! She never accepted me for me and was never ever satisfied! All my ex girlfriends have been project hood chicks that were content with who I am and never complained. I love I can be myself and not judged for drinking a beer out the bottle or picking my nose if I felt a booga in it! I once dated a beautiful Jamaican girl who grew up in London. She talked like Queen Elizabeth. She was educated, very proper with good eticate. My mother loved her, and I couldn’t take her no more than 10 months! She complained about everything! I worked 60 hrs a week, went to school and was a single father at 23. Nothing was ever good enough for her, plus she was boring in bed! Give me a hood chick who will light my L and crack my beer when I come home, take a sip before passing it to me, feed me, laugh and talk with me, put me in the shower and freak me till we fall asleep! Don’t need much except a loyal women who got my back and not irritate me with frivolities or drama. Yeah hood chicks usually come with drama, but if you’re not thorough enough to “check it” then you’re just not built for it! Go get you one of them demanding upscales and be someone you’re not just to appease her and be miserable until you meet up with a hood chick then you can be yourself without a magnifying glass.

-Experience Was My Teacher



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