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In the digital world, and the physical world, I keep hearing women talk about finding a husband, and how hard it is to get one. Ladies, it is not that serious or hard at all. Men are quite simple, so you can get one, if you want one. If you want a husband, find one and marry his ass. The problem is that you want Tall, Dark, Rich, Handsome, Muscles, A little of this, a little of that, but I am here to tell that it WILL NOT HAPPEN! There is no perfect man, and I am willing to bet that you are not so perfect your damn self!
Who am I, you ask? I am a 32 year old faithful husband, step-father of three, hardworking man. The only reason that I use the word step-father is because it shows that there are some good men out there that will accept a woman with kids and treat them as their own. I’m no Denzel, but I’m tall, got a few extra pounds, and I won’t hurt your eyes. I have always been romantic, considerate, and a gentleman. I have dated women of all ages and gotten looked over before I met my wife. With that being said, there are plenty of other men out there who fit the same criteria. Now, the dude might be a little nerdy, that just means he is smart. He might have a few extra pounds, more than likely, you do too. If you don’t, send his ass to the gym to work out. He might not be the best looking man but keep his ass groomed and dressed pretty good, then you can take him out. The real problem is women do not know what to look for in a man.
Let’s take away all of the physical features and deal with what kind of person you want, or should want. Most women would want a nice, sweet, charming, and romantic man who will listen to them. The type of man who makes them feel as if they are the only woman alive. Am I right, or at least kind of close? How about the type of man that would not mind holding your hand in the public, and/or the type of man that loves to take you out to a nice concert or event? Now I am pretty sure that all of this sounds quite well, but all of this is not good enough for you. You would probably also like this man I just described to have a damn good job, look good, and be physically fit. It’s okay to want all of this, but I’m about to keep it way too real with you. You can have all of this, but you might not be able to get this all at one time. For instance, the dude at Burger king might have all of the qualities, but you would never know, due to the fact that “who wants to date the guy at Burger King”?
What you don’t know is that the guy at BK is working on his Bachelor’s Degree, or he is saving his money to start a business. This guy just might be working there part time because his full-time job does not pay him enough to be able to afford the house that he is buying. What about the big dude that’s just a little “too heavy” for ya? You didn’t know that dude was hitting the gym like 4 times a week and was shedding pounds like crazy. He is also romantic and is looking for a woman to spoil because he also makes damn good money. What about the Nerdy looking guy who would rather play chess at Books-a-Million than hit the club? You assumed that he was a little soft because of his glasses and pocket protector, but didn’t know he would beat a dude down for even thinking about disrespecting you. You chose to look past these guys, now don’t you? Even if you were to give them a chance, it would have ended up like this…
Yeah girl, he was sweet but we can’t live off of Burger King money!
He was romantic but he was too big for me.
He treated me like a queen, was smart, but he was to corny!
Now let me tell you who you would give a chance to…good old Tyrone! Tyrone has 4 kids, 4 baby mamas, and all the ladies love Tyrone. Tyrone drives a Benzo, has a nice little job, tall, has some baby hair, and this dude is all the way smooth. You love the excitement Tyrone brings to your life! You also know about all of the ladies and the baby moms, but there is something telling you that you can change Tyrone. After all, all he needs is a good woman like you, right? Some time goes by, and you end up having Tyrone’s 5thchild and he still won’t settle down. He is going to dip out and go and find him victim number six, and there you go talking about “I don’t know what’s wrong with these men?’ Guess what, you looked over all the good men. There was something wrong with those other dudes; they just didn’t have that swagger that you liked. I will tell you like this, keep on looking past those guys that do not just jump out at you from first glance, somebody else is going to snag those guys up. When you hit those mid 30’s and have not had a proposal yet, do not blame it on men, blame it on ya damn self!
When it comes to us, we are simple as can be. All a man wants is some food, loving, and for his woman to stroke his ego every now and again. You know! Tell him that he is all the man that you ever wanted. Make him feel like you are proud to have him, and that other dude’s don’t have anything on him. Make him feel like a man, not the little guy at the job that’s barely making it.
Let me tell you about my flaws. In high school I was the boney, skinny guy that was shy as hell. I remember working at a department store and the girls use to say that I was just straight up in down because of my Snoop Dogg physique. I remember the girls saying that I was not tough enough because I tried to spoil my women. I wasn’t the thug nasty guy, but the Babyface “as soon as I get home from work” type of dude. I was a little sensitive back in the day; a brother was a little spoiled coming up. I had to develop more of a backbone. I dated them young, my age, and much older, and they chose to pass me up.
When my wife met me, I was 6’6, 270lbs from hitting the weights, working 2 jobs, and had a nice little savings with no kids. She did not pass me up, and I’m glad that she didn’t. I’m a little heavier right now because married life has made me lazy, but I am going to get it right soon, at least I hope. I said all of that to say, we good men are not perfect by a long shot, but give that dude that you did not think was all that a chance. You don’t know what you could be missing. What do you have to lose?