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Catch Me Elsewhere
I thought I have heard it all but when I found myself a third wheel in a few friends “twitter-lationships” I knew my life had taken a depressing turn. Let me back up a bit. You meet a great guy on twitter (please hold your laughter until you hear me out) – you tell your friends they clamor to his twitter bio, spend a respectable amount of time complimenting YOU on HIS avi, the abs in his header are drool worthy and after scrutinizing his bio fully they all seem to agree that based on his profile page he is the perfect man for you and before the year is over you will be man and wife.
Via text or group chat everyone has weighed in with their pros and cons based SOLELY on his last 10 tweets, his female to male follower ratio and how many hours in a day go by before he @’s you. Screenshots of text conversations between your and your TweetyBoo are now group property and it is determined by the one single frenemie you all tolerate that he has done the unthinkable – he’s asked you OFFLINE if the conversation between you and your girlfriends on twitter at all in reference to him. (clutches pearls) You know the smiley infused tweets about men thinking they are slick, flirting with all their followers and maybe carrying on an illicit affair via DM.
By the end of week 2 he has been demoted to “All Men are the Same” and you’ve began responding to his texts as slow as humanly possible without him cutting you off completely. While your gang is now reporting back hourly on his timeline and some have now decided to stand guard at his Instagram and Facebook -YOU have now began a new “back up” relationship via DM. Oddly enough you all agree this is acceptable because how dare he play you by responding to his female followers by their REAL name – he obviously is cheating on you with this hussy. So now the proverbial shyt has hit the fan meaning your best 3 and her best 3 have now identified each other and the subs start flying.
I don’t see a reason to not meet someone on Twitter and begin dating the problem is when you begin to foster a twitter-lationship. Any and everything related to you as a couple is twitter centric. Dating is hard enough but when you don’t have a true sense of who a person is you can’t form a real opinion can you? So you become more susceptible to others opinions influencing how you think. If you meet a man in real life how soon do you introduce him to your friends? You are forced to take everything he says at face value, right? Would you hire a P.I to follow him around to be sure everything he is saying to you is fact? So why do we allow the twitter personality to rule the relationship? In the same breath I will also say that acting completely disrespectful online and using the excuse “It’s just twitter” isn’t acceptable either.
As ridiculous as all of that sounds this is really happening. Professional Tweet Analyzing is apparently a real thing and completely acceptable character determination to be used in lieu of logging off and getting to know a person. If I met a man via Twitter and he had to judge me solely on my last 10 tweets on my worst day I might be labeled everything but a child of God. So why has this become acceptable dating practice? Twitter is a great place to network and meet new friends but we must extend the same courtesy we expect to receive. At some point it is in the best interest of your sanity to not use Twitter as a lie detector. Keeping it real doesn’t mean you are required to fully outline every detail of your life via social media. So if he says via text “I’m at the crib with my boys” but his twitter personality tweets “Chilling at the mall copping the new J’s” you don’t combine the two and come up with your own reality. Learn to live in the now.
The bottom-line is regardless of where or how you meet someone get to know THEM in real life. As you get to know each other you will gain different levels of respect for each other and at that point you should see a difference in online behaviors. However, if you are a full on couple and the other person is reinforcing on social media how single they are… RUN!
Photo Credits: thegloss.com, best-singles-sites.com