Don’t Miss A Thing. Subscribe Today!
Catch Me Elsewhere
The past few weeks have been CRAZY in my world as far as dating is concerned and unfortunately, my superficial side has reared it’s ugly little head again but this time, I think that it was warranted. Here is my latest dating disasters!
A guy that I met online, probably about 2 years ago had been trying to reconnect with me on Facebook but in my Erykah Badu voice, “I was in a situation,” so I paid him no mind. Now that Boo Thang and I are no more, I decided not be so short with my answers when he messaged me on Facebook.
Now back then, I was not interested because I felt like he didn’t have his shit together, lived with his sister and barely worked. I also felt like he was trying to get in good so that he could move in and we all know THAT WASN’T GOING TO HAPPEN! So, through conversations via Facebook, I thought I would give him another chance, since he was now working for the Post Office (benefits) and had seemed to have his stuff together or so I thought!
Last week, I invited him over. Now via text messages, earlier that day, I asked if he was bringing dinner or cooking dinner and he said neither because he didn’t get paid until Friday. “Okay,” I responded. “I’ll figure something out.” So on my way home, I stopped and got myself something to eat. He arrived about 2 hours later and I quickly remembered why I wasn’t attracted to him. Besides all the other stuff was that his grill was foul! His teeth looked like they were all fighting one another to escape from his mouth. “Be cool,” Ty, I told myself and tried to make small talk.
During our conversation, I discovered that he was a temp at the Post Office, still lived with his sister and his cell phone was a Boost Mobile! Now, call me bourgeois but all I kept seeing as I talked to him was 3 strikes, like on the game show, Family Feud! Then he asked me what did I eat and I told him a pastrami from The Hat and he had the nerve to ask did I get him something? “Ummm…no…You don’t get paid until Friday. What were you going to eat if you didn’t see me?” Now, what I really wanted to say was “MF please!”
Now by now, I was so turned off, that I started yawning and was suddenly so damn tired that I couldn’t keep my eyes open. I walked him to the door and when he tried to reach in for a hug, I faked a sneeze and said good night…slamming the door behind him!
I immediately began to think, “how could I dismiss him without causing a bunch of drama” so I sent him the following text message:
Thank you for your interest in me but unfortunately the feelings are not mutual. Good luck & I wish you well.
My little sister said after I told her the story, “Sounds like he was applying for a job and didn’t get it….Then again I guess that’s about right! To deal with you is like having a full-time job!” I guess it is but I just was not feeling him!
I know some of you are going to say that I was wrong and that I should have got him something to eat, etc…etc but here’s the deal…if I am feeling you, I have no problem getting you something to eat BUT I just wasn’t feeling him and didn’t want to continue wasting my time or his.
Now, if that story was not enough, at work this week, I am ringing on the register and this guy comes through my line. He has some groceries and I greet him and proceed to ring him up. While ringing him up, he says, “You cute. You the new manager?”
I looked down at my name tag that says, “Ty – Store Manager” and responded “Yes.”
“You should let me take you out sometime.” Before I can responded to his comment because it sure wasn’t a question, I tell him his total. “That will be $16.11.”
“I’m going to pay with my EBT card,” he said like he was saying, “Ain’t no shame in my game!”
I quickly finished the transaction and said, “Thank you. Have a nice day.” All the while thinking, am I being Punked? Really, a grown ass man with an EBT card! I can’t!!!
The struggle is real, folks! The struggle is REAL!!
Photo Credits: ebt.ca.gov, mashable.com, grumpy.blog.co.uk, steppingupaustralia.com.au