Hi everyone, my name is Natasha. I just turned 30 this year and I live in New Jersey with my toddler son, who will be 2 in July. I currently work as a Consultant with a small, but growing firm, working on grants and financial management. I am also attending graduate school, pursuing my Master’s in Project Management. My hobbies are reading, blogging, and spending quality time with my lil man. My passion in life is helping others – any opportunity I can find to help others, I will find a way to make it happen.
How did you become a single mom, i.e. divorce (what’s your story).
I became a single mom when I found out that my significant other of about 3 years was sleeping with every Nicki, Simone, and Brenda that he could find in the Tri-State area. By then, I was already pregnant and trying to figure out what to do with the relationship. The decision was made very quickly when we got into a physical altercation after I confronted him about his numerous affairs. Although a tumultuous end, we are now working towards building a great co-parenting relationship for our son.
Do you date? Are you in a relationship? When do you think that single moms should bring the men they date around their child? Is dating different as a single parent? Do you think it is harder to date as a single mom?
I have dated in the past, but not currently in a relationship. I’m just enjoying being single at the moment and spending quality time with my lil man.
It is definitely hard dating as a single mom. You don’t know who to trust and you are even more careful and paranoid than before, making sure that you are doing what’s best for both you and your child. I don’t think that single moms should freely bring their dates around their child. I think it really depends on your date. I have only brought one date around my son, and only because I felt it was the right time. It was a casual introduction over breakfast at my son’s favorite restaurant, Ihop, and we just got to know each other a little bit better. Otherwise, I have spoken about my son, but no one else has met him yet.
What advice would you give to a newly single mom?
The advice I would give is the best advice I’ve received – you’re human, you will make mistakes, just love your child nonetheless.
In other words, don’t try to go out there and be the perfect parent. Just be the best parent that you can be. Accept the fact that sometimes you will make mistakes. And, at the end of the day, just love your child. Everything will make sense in time.
3 words that would describe you?
Ambitious, passionate, inspired
3 words that describe your parenting style?
Loving, nurturing, disciplinary
How do you respond to people who say, “I don’t know how you single moms do it. It must be so hard?”
Yes, it’s hard, but it’s rewarding. It’s the hardest thing that you’ll ever do in your life. As a single mom, I try to overcompensate for all of the life lessons and expectations that my son should have if he had both parents living with him.
But it is completely rewarding, too. It’s so great to have one-on-one time with my lil man every day. I would never be able to truly do that if I was in a relationship. My son isn’t missing out on anything, though. I honestly don’t feel like my son is missing anything. He gets to see and have quality time with both of his parents almost every day.
Do you think that people look down on single mothers?
Yes, many people do look down on single mothers. They have the stereotype in their mind that single mothers are just abusing the system – welfare, food stamps, affordable housing. They don’t recognize the single mothers that are successful career-minded individuals that will do any and every-thing to make sure that their child would never go without. But the stereotype is recognized more as the norm, so people will unfortunately continue to look down on single mothers.
You can find Natasha at:
Blog: Epic Mommy Adventures
Facebook: Epic Mommy Adventures